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Concerned that you may be divorcing a narcissist?

There are few things more difficult than weathering a relationship with a narcissist. The trouble with this reality is that narcissism is not always easy to spot. In fact, it is the very nature of narcissism that others are often temporarily blinded to the faults of a narcissist in favor of his or her charisma and drive.

If your spouse is a narcissist and you are thinking about divorce or have already filed for divorce, it is important to communicate with your attorney your concerns that your spouse may be a narcissist. Otherwise, your spouse could very easily take advantage of you and leave you in a less than desirable position as you seek to rebuild your life. But what if you are not sure whether your spouse is indeed a narcissist?

Narcissism is a clinical term. One can only be officially diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder after being evaluated by a mental health professional. However, you may be able to make an “armchair diagnosis” of your spouse if you research the signs and symptoms of narcissism. Even an armchair diagnosis can help you to deal with your situation properly, if your spouse fits the profile of a narcissist.

Individuals are often drawn to narcissists because they seem remarkably self-confident, polished and charming. They tend to shower others with attention and compliments initially. However, their approach to relationships tends to change over time. They tend to treat anyone they perceive as inferior very poorly. They tend to charm their spouse’s loved ones and then alienate them over time. They tend to be materialistic and focus a tremendous amount of energy on fulfilling their own needs. While these individuals initially make their significant others feel very valued initially, they then make their partners feel like they are never ever “enough.”

If you think that you may be married to a narcissist, please dig into additional research on this subject. Failure to spot the signs before your divorce process is complete may lead to a divorce settlement that significantly favors your spouse.

Source: The Huffington Post, “8 Undeniable Signs You've Fallen For A Narcissist,” Brittany Wong, Jan. 14, 2016

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